Congratulations, Ashley B! You won a copy of Amber Garza’s book, PROWL. Happy Reading!!
I will reach out to you for your address.
PROWL is a Homerun! I have to say I thought the book would be the typical summer teen romance but nothing doing. I sat down this weekend to read a couple of chapters and could not put the book down, and when I turned the last page I didn’t want it to end. Amber Garza does a fabulous job of connecting us with McKenzie and her fear becomes our fear as she unearths the dangers of witchcraft. Kenzie’s pain and the way she deals with it are reality for many teen girls. I will be ordering the next book in her series, ENTICE, today!
I had my first big crush when I was thirteen. He was a boy who lived around the corner from me. I would clamor to sit next to him on the bus, used any excuse to talk to him, and even prank called him from time to time. One day I urged a friend of mine to call him and find out if he liked me. So she dialed his number while I listened on the other line, scarcely breathing. My heart raced and palms moistened. When my friend asked if he liked me he laughed and said, “Maybe if she was thinner and had a smaller nose.”
My chest tightened, my stomach plummeted. The ground beneath me gave way, the walls closed in around me. After that, I hated my reflection. All I saw was a fat, ugly girl with a beak. I might have been able to dismiss his hurtful words if it hadn’t been for the fact that I had been teased about my looks since I was little. My self-image was poor before even making the phone call. The blow was more than I could bear. For him it was just a mean thing to say, and he probably forgot it within days, maybe hours. For me, it was a moment I have never forgotten and it took years for me to get over.
I became obsessed with my make-up, hairstyles and clothes, using anything I could to detract from what I felt were my glaring flaws. By the time I was fifteen, I gave up trying to look like a supermodel and instead tried to dress as freaky as possible. I dressed in all black or crazy over-the-top thrift store outfits. My face was made up in stark white with dark eyeliner in a large swoop that went from my eye to my hairline, and I painted my lips in dark black or red lipstick. My goal was to put on a mask to hide behind. On the exterior I was tough, someone who didn’t care what people thought of me; a person who rebelled against the norm, who wasn’t afraid to go against the grain. Inside I was sensitive and needy, crying out for someone to love me.
For years I searched in all the wrong places for unconditional love and I always ended up disappointed. I finally became convinced that no one would ever love me the way I wanted and needed to be loved. I was wrong. There was someone who loved me and thought I was beautiful and wonderful just the way I was. He was my creator.
Psalm 139:13-14 reads: For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. In Genesis we are told that God created us in His image. You and I were created in the image of God and we are fearfully and wonderfully made. We are not accidents. We are not mistakes. We are his beloved creation and when He sees us His heart is ravished with love. Song of Songs 2:10 says: My lover spoke and said to me, “Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me.” Jesus is our lover and we are his bride. He is calling us beautiful and drawing us to himself. In Song of Songs 4:7 it reads: All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you.
Jesus thinks I am beautiful just as I am. He doesn’t want me to have a smaller nose or thinner body. He doesn’t judge me as the world does. He isn’t comparing me to supermodels or the world’s idea of beauty. When I finally let go of my expectations of the world’s idea of me and looked to God for my self-worth, I was able to see myself the way He does.
Now when I look in the mirror I see a beautiful woman. I see a child of the most-high God. I see Jesus’ bride. I know who I am and no one can take that from me.
God wants you to know how amazing you are.
You are gorgeous. You are precious. You are valued. You are loved.
Click this link to buy my teen thriller PROWL